People lie to make themselves look better. They take attention of themselves and direct it towards you a and all the wrong doings you have done. Just to never seem bad. They always pin it on you and tell you your the problem. I’m kinda tired of feeling like I’m not good enough. Have you ever felt like you can fall out of love?
I’ve been trying to stay busy as a distraction from how lonely I feel, but every so often that emptiness creeps up, and around me
What a week and the week isn’t even over. I’ve learned so much over the course of one week, more than usual. I appreciate all the people in my life I truly do a day doesn’t go by where I don’t pray for God to cover and keep them. Even when my life is in madness. There is always someone to uplift me. Funny thing, they never really know it. I’m not the biggest talker. I’m so good at saying everything is okay. When really everything isn’t and I’m on the verge of crying. Every time I go through something I pull away from everyone. Sometimes I notice sometimes I don’t. I think over the last couple of months so much has changed. For both better and worst. ( I know it makes no sense ). I’m at stand still in my life. Someone so dear to me told me if I don’t stop overthinking things will just get worse. Oh boy wasn’t he correct. I can’t end 2014 the way I ended 2013. People come and go, things change, time doesn’t stop for anyone and life goes on. That doesn’t mean I have to stop living. Although I’m alive I feel dead. Walking with no purpose in this moment. Sometimes I won’t I truly am a crappy person. I’m blathering and sitting on the floor at work writing. Oh boy don’t I need a life. Welp. It’s 8:54. I get off at 9 and it’s almost time to go. Until later
- Warmly, Katt
"Sometimes I imagine my own autopsy. Disappointment in myself: right kidney. Disappointment of others in me: left kidney. Personal failures: kishkes. When the clocks are turned back and the dark falls before I’m ready, this, for reasons I can’t explain, I feel in my wrists. And when I wake up and…
Despite everything I know I’m NOT a bad person. In my eyes ” bad people ” don’t exist misguided people do.